Conversational Interviews

Recently, I commented on a post about making interviews a conversation rather than an interrogation and it got me thinking about this blog that I do. I am one of those strange people that love to interview when I am looking for a job. I do not like looking for a job, mind you. I would rather have one however, I love when the interviewer asks questions that I have not had before, and I really get to dig deep into my past and talk about the fun that I have had in my past career as an HR professional. Yes, I have had fun!

If you are an HR person like me, you are truly passionate about the subject of HR. Employee relations, training, and yes, even the icky stuff like FMLA, ADA, and worker’s compensation. Of course, we prefer things that make us happier like the employee relations stuff and training, but it all balances out if we have a good team and a great boss.

Let us get back to the interview process though. In the beginning when we are hiring for a position and we have the luxury of conducting a phone interview with the candidate, I personally like to ask two types of questions. The first few are housekeeping questions. Why are you looking? What kind of notice are you giving? How did you hear about us? What kind of salary are you looking for? This last one is tricky because people get shy about this one. I personally like to give a range so that there are clear expectations of where the salary is compared to where their budget lies. If they know what the range is, they can see if it fits within their needs. If not, then the interview can end right then and there. We do not waste each other’s time. The next set of questions pertain to the job itself and I always begin by saying the following sentence: “I have a bunch of questions and I hope to have a fun conversation with you. During the course of our conversation, you might answer questions I have not asked you yet, so bear with me while I take notes, lets have some fun!” Then we begin. This is when you start the conversation. The interview may start out slow but if you engage in something they say, the candidate may start to relax and show you bits and pieces of their personality or the true passion they have for the position they are applying for.

One of my favorite conversations was with a man that loved to garden. We were hiring for a groundskeeping role, and he was talking about how much he loved to garden. He went on about the tools he liked to use to edge the lawn and how he took pride in making the edge straight up the walkway to the front door. It was moving. I know that sounds silly, but he was so passionate about what he did for a living that I moved him on to the next round and he got the job. He has been with the company for 12 years now. He does not need to be promoted; he is not looking for a management position. He is content and happy living his best life making the garden, lawn, and grounds beautiful and being happy in the process. A true work/life balance.

I know that sometimes we focus on the gaps in employment. I even have some gaps. Life happens. Sometimes we take time to have kids, we get laid off and have a hard time finding a new job due to the economy, we have ill family members that need care. As an HR professional, I tend not to focus on these too hard. I will ask about them, I want someone that is serious about staying in a position because as we all know, turnover is expensive. We do not want to have to rehire someone over and over again.

It is time to have those fun conversations with your candidates, see what you can find out. Listen to the other jobs that they have worked and the other skills they gave obtained for the current position you are offering. Education in a field is great, but you cannot beat real-world work experience. When a candidate is comfortable, they will reveal more of themselves to you.

Being the Bigger Person

It is so hard to be the bigger person when you are on the receiving end of a rant. If the information you hear is negative and hurtful, it can cause us to want to get revenge. Sometimes we receive these hurtful messages in an email or text. What this really means is the sender was hiding behind their computer or phone. These are especially hard not to respond to. I will always remind you that perception is everything! People put their own spin on the tone of your message regardless of your intentions. The best thing to do is nothing at all.

Should we respond or should we walk away? Think about what you would say and if it would really make a difference. Would it make you feel better? Probably not.

Being the bigger person and ignoring the negativity is the best approach. It is non-confrontational and the more professional way to handle the situation. Should you document what was said? Absolutely. This way you have proof of the conversation as well as the beginnings of a time-line if things escalate later on. You will put it aside in case you need it.

The person that has ranted toward you and the rant itself, has now lost all of its power. By responding you would have only added fuel to the fire. Being the bigger person, you have silently taken that power away from them.

This skill is something you must practice frequently as we tend to react quickly to people and forget to stop and think before we respond. I encourage you all to walk away from conflict when you can. It’s just not worth the trouble.

Making the Change

I haven’t written in a while due to the virus, a long, difficult job and some mental health struggles.

This has been a most challenging 15 months for me and many of you as well. I have made the decision to migrate. I’m moving closer to where I feel my life will be in alignment and my mental health will flourish.

A warm environment. A new job. A new home. As I travel down the highways of the states, I see many cars and trucks with all their belongings packed in trailers, and storage units on top of their vehicles. I am not the only one.

If this experience has taught us anything, it has shown us to be true to ourselves, be closer to family, to find companies that are worthy of our time, and not to let that work/life balance line blur just because we are working from home.

Working 14 hours a day and weekends is not healthy when you can’t do anything else. Now we are getting vaccinated. Now shops and other businesses are opening back up so we can start to resume life again. I just don’t want us to do this too soon to start another wave. I want this to go away!

Well, I am headed for a new place, just me and my bird. I’m excited to be on this journey and start blogging again. I hope you can join me.

Let me know if you are making a big “COVID” move, or know someone who has. I would love to hear their story!